Be Like Rebecca! Lesson 4 from Ted Lasso

Lesson four from Ted Lasso. In lesson one we talked about being positive, but being open to sitting with people in their pain (Ted). Lesson two dealt with being supportive of the leader and learning to be a great follower (Beard). In lesson three we learned the value of pushing your team. We hi-lighted the fact that everyone needs your coaching and that life has seasons (Roy). This week we’re studying Rebecca and her ability to forgive, make new friends which opened her heart to love again.

Who is Rebecca?

Rebecca is the owner of a football (soccer) team. She became the owner of the team as part of a contentious divorce settlement. At the beginning of the series, she is angry and bitter. Her great desire is to ruin the team in order to hurt her ex-husband. She hires Ted because he knows nothing about football and she hopes he’ll destroy the team. Her character goes through drastic changes.

Learn to forgive

Rebecca is angry. Her husband has cheated on her and embarrassed her publicly. She has the right to be angry. You probably have someone who has hurt you and you may feel that you have the right to hate this person. But you may find that, like Rebecca, your desire to remain angry and get even has a tendency to hurt everyone around you.

Rebecca comes to a realization that she needs to tell Ted that she is using him to get even with her ex-husband. What happens next becomes a hinge point for her character. She asks for forgiveness. Ted forgives her and says, “You know I think that if you care about someone and you’ve got a little love in your heart, there ain’t nothing you can’t get through together.”

Receiving forgiveness releases a flood of emotions. We need to both ask for forgiveness and generously give forgiveness to the people around us. (At this point I will add the disclaimer that you never remain in a physically or mentally abusive relationship. Forgiveness doesn’t mean that others get to continually beat on you.). Staying angry and refusing to forgive hurts you, not the other person. Forgive others and be free!

Make new friends

Rebecca has weathered a terrible divorce. Her social circle is a mess. She feels alone. You may feel like you can relate. You may be fired from a job or you may have moved to a new area. Be open to new friendships.

Rebecca meets a young lady named Keeley. These two seem to have nothing in common. Keeley is much younger, she’s from a different generation. Rebecca is accustomed to high society and Keeley is a young model who hasn’t lived in the world of the rich. They speak with different accents. You wouldn’t put these two together. And yet, they become great friends and both benefit from that friendship.

We need friendships. Friends that are from different cultures and generations make us stronger. If we only hang out with people who look and sound like us, we miss out. We need to know how other generations think. How do different cultures process current events? And, how can we support others. It’s not all about receiving. Friendship is a two way street. You have something to offer to others as well. You will grow in ways that you can’t currently conceive.

Love again

This is a spoiler… Rebecca falls in love again. She would never have found love if she had remained bitter. Love wouldn’t have come to her if she refused to widen her circle of friends. Everything flows from forgiveness and ends in love.

I’ll wrap this up with a very popular definition of love that comes from the Bible. 1 Corinthians 13:3-7 from the Message version:

Love never gives up.
Love cares more for others than self.
Love doesn’t want want it doesn’t have.
Love doesn’t strut,
Doesn’t have a swelled head,
Doesn’t force itself on others,
Isn’t always “me first”
Doesn’t fly off the handle,
Doesn’t keep score of the sins of others,
Doesn’t revel when others grovel,
Takes pleasure in the flowering of truth,
Puts up with anything,
Trusts God always,
Always looks for the best,
Never looks back,
But keeps going to the end.

Love never dies.

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